This is going to sound nuts, but I’ve been under so much stress from the headaches that sometimes, the thought of smoking has entered my mind, Of course I’d never do it, but I envy the seeming tranquility of smokers. What is probably the true source of their calm is the deep breathing that smoking requires. Anyways, I would never, ever do it.
But it crosses my mind. Silly, right?
Still pondering things...
Years ago, I got this book as an impulse purchase: Jewish Meditation: A Practical Guide. From what I remember of it, parts of the meditation are grounded in theology – such as using the Hebrew names for God as part of a meditation, as well as the more well-known things that go into meditation and relaxation: breathing exercises, focusing on where your body is in space, and so forth.
The religious part just doesn’t feel right to me – it never has – but on the other hand, it’s simply another language: Hebrew. Nothing magical about that. Some people derive real comfort from believing in God – I’m not one of them. At least, I’m not interested enough at this point to pin it down one way or the other. So I guess you could call me a culturally Jewish secular agnostic. Going on the popular “Shit Happens” Guide to Ideology and Religions, my view might be summed up as follows:
Why does shit always happen to me…assuming there may or may not be shit in the first place? I need evidence for this shit that is provable beyond a reasonable doubt.
For instance, I often find myself saying or thinking…
“If God exists, he’s got a really rotten sense of humour.”
